Blog - Page #2

I won the Lottery!!!!!

(If you want the back ground on this, read "Flying By The Seat Of My Pants" first - posted Aug 7th.)

When I got off the plane in Myrtle Beach, sure enough, no one was there.

After a couple of phone calls, I found out that I’d be staying at the home of the couple that was going to pick me up. I cringed. The news was a bit of a buzz kill. I was hoping for a hotel near the beach, now I was sure I’d be staying with someone’s grandparents, or by the looks of the crowd there, someone’s great-grandparents.

This hip chick comes striding through the airport with the confidence of a honky suburban Grace Jones - and I felt like a dog in a pound, my eyes got huge and my soul sang "pick me!"

Flying By The Seat Of My Pants

A few weeks ago, I get a phone call with a bad connection from a well known comic. He asks if I got his previous message. No. Asks if I’m available in a few weeks to be a part of a 5 camera shoot in Myrtle Beach, 15 min set, to be a part of the “new Christian Comics” thing, and to call him back later. It doesn’t pay, but the exposure could be mega worth it. Are you kidding me? You had me at 5 cameras.

So I cancel some club work I had booked for that weekend. When I call him back, the connection is even worse. He’s in Nebraska he says, and all I can picture is him out on some windswept field with horses and mountains in the distance. Likely I am confusing Nebraska with Montana. Likely he’s in a windy Wallmart parking lot.

Kids taught me how.

It’s August 17th, and I’ve got one more show at McCurdy’s. A family show, and I’m thinking I’m the Emcee. Hard to warm up a room of kids, as they are untrained in knowing what to do in a comedy theatre, or anywhere else for that matter…save the playground at McDonalds. Anyway, I had kind of a bad attitude because my last family show there was pretty wonky, none of my material was working and I was dying…or at least suffocating with hypothermia.

So I’m on the way there and on the phone with a veteran comic who is GREAT with kids. I’m like “Dude, gimme some advice.” He says “Oh, just stay positive, make big facial gestures and silly voices.” – Are you kidding me? That’s what I’ve been doing since I was a kid. It’s how I pass the time. Don’t judge.

Bob Hope's writer coming to Conference

I know what you are thinking -
Christian Comedy?
Isn't that an oxymoron?
Look, you know me, you know I'm not going to tell you something that isn't true.
Chonda Pierce, the President of the Christian Comedy Association is a creative genius.
You don't believe me? She just had another DVD go Platinum. But don't believe all those people that bought it - believe me when I tell you she's like the Elvis of Clean Comedy with a purpose.
Look - I know the word "Christian" is a loaded word. Everyone makes all kinds of assumptions when you hear that word.
Please do yourself a favor and put down your assumptions for 2 days and just come and learn about the business and creative process of the thing you love - stand-up comedy.

So I got on stage and started doing the opposite.

Some of the people in the comedy world around me get on stage and talk about how they don’t believe in God. So I got on stage and started doing the opposite. Now I do jokes about how I got Baptized as an adult, in a 2,000 seat all African American Baptist church. There was me, and about 20 little 5 year olds with their hair in braids…and me. I fit right in. Right – I’ve never fit in, I’m a comic. All comics come from the Island of Misfit Toys. Anyway, I talk about a few embarrassing moments, and then I end with mentioning how for three days afterwards I was filled with the lightest, brightest, clearest, blissful energy. Call it the Holy Ghost or Spirit or whatever, but it happened. Didn’t expect it. But there it was. That’s my personal experience, and how can you deny your pwn personal experience? Years later I read that bit in the Bible about how if you ask Jesus into your heart, you'll be filled with the Holy Spirit - and I was like- that happened to me. Wow. That's true.

ATTENTION FUNNY FOLKS (and a those that think you're funny, ha!):

You are invited to the 9th Annual Comedy Conference sponsored by the CCA.

The Conference will be kicked off with a Comedy Concert on Sunday Night (May 31st) where many of our veteran comics donate their time to raise money for the CCA to keep your Conference fee reasonable priced. Our official registration for the Conference begins around 8:30AM, Monday June 1st until 10pm on Tuesday night, June 2nd. You will not want to miss a moment. Come with your questions, your enthusiasm and your best game face to dive into two busy days for all of us.

Day 1 on the bus

Wow. I'm actually on a big old rock-n-roll tour bus! It has flames on the side and everything. It belongs to a big deal Country music band, so the coat racks are upside down pistols and there are black leather couches, flat screen TVs, rhinestone door handles...it's totally cool.

There are 8 of us on the bus. Headliner Chonda Pierce, Feature artist Leland Klassen, myself, the tour manager, merchandise guy, two drivers and the producer. Everyone is so totally nice and cool, and multidimensional, interesting, smart, funny, so I'm totally blessed to be with this crew.

I was told the sleeping areas were little coffins, and it's not so bad. The bed is really soft, and there are little TV's in every bunk! I'm only telling all these details because lots of my friends have been asking what it's like. The cool thing for me about falling asleep on the bus is that it reminded me of my childhood. My Mom was an amazingly strong woman who took all her kids, all 4 of us on long road trips when we were growing up. She alone took us everywhere, out west camping in the desert, up to Canada around the Great Lakes, over to New Hampshire plenty of times to see our family over there. But my point is, that falling sleep in the bus made me feel like a child again, all stretched out, soft pillow, warm blanket while the vehicle rolled over the land. She always kept us safe. She was so responsible for all us kids and did a great job. I wish she was still alive so I could sing her praises to her.

For the past few months I've been thinking that my whole life has been preparing me for this opportunity, that I was meant to do this. Now I realize that it started as young as childhood with my Mom raising us in truck stops across America. Thanks Mom.

God works in mysterious ways. He gave me the PERFECT mother, and I sure didn't know that for most of my life.

So I'll close this blog out by saying...it's all working out, even when it looks like it's the worst thing ever, for some strange reason it will be exactly what we need, maybe years down the road, for us to be in the place to reach our potential.

And our potential? Now that's a whole 'nuther story. Now that I've made it on the bus, I have a WHOLE lot of skills to acquire about networking with the promoters, marketing and all that. Potential means growing out of our cocoon. And I'm plannin' on busting out!!! Hope you do too... Peace, Zan

Zan's Blog